Wanted Wild West People

Here is a fictitious list of fictional people (that I made up) and the fictional reason they are wanted: 

Tall Paul  -  Wanted, but why?  Because he was the only one that could reach the stuff on the top shelf.

Short Mort  -  Wanted for sneaking in under the circus tent.

Silly Billy  -  Wanted for telling stupid, silly jokes.

Willy-Nilly -  Wanted for going off in every direction.

Wild Child  -  The youngest outlaw in the Wild West.

Bad Man Ann  -  Wanted for being a Bad Female Hippie. . man.

Fat Pat  -  Wanted for eating all the food at the buffet.

Skinny Minnie  -  Wanted for shooting Fat Pat because she was next in line for the now empty buffet.

Zippy-a-Dee-Do-Da.  -  A happy bandit from the deep south.

Slick Vic  -  Wanted for stealing all the Brylcreem.

Stable Able  -  Worked cleaning out stables and walked with a Cain cane.

Ike Clanger  -  No not Clanton.  Clanger was the local bell ringer.

Bobber Bob  -  Was caught trying to hide in a fisherman's tackle box.

I got lots more, but my wife is ready to head for town, so will stop here.  Hope you liked my sense of humor in names and please, have a great day, you hear?

What To Do Without TV

I was watching my regular old west TV shows this weekend and, puff, it was gone.  No, not the TV, just the picture on the TV.  It said that it lost the signal.  What?!?!?  I went outside and there was a mostly clear sky and I also checked, and the dish was still on the roof.  Yes, I have Dish satellite TV service.  I called them and they said that repairmen would be able to come out on Monday and, sure enough, they did.  They put new receiver buds on the part that picks up the signal that bounced off the dish and also repositioned it by pointed it to the eastern satellite instead of the western one that it had been pointing at.  They said there was less obstructions in that direction.

To make a long story short, they got their job done, the ladder loaded back up on their truck, and the best part, I can now receive all the stations I used to.  Funny, my wife was just saying before all this happened that maybe it would be better (no loosing the signal on stormy days) and cheaper to get the TV by other means.  Of course I am spoiled and like what we got.  For the mean time, I guess we will be keeping Dish.  They were nice enough to waive the ninety some dollar service charge, so it cost us nothing.  Yes, I was pleased about that.  OK, now let me get back to watching Wagon Train and I want all of you to have a great day, you hear?

Do It In Ernest

How many times have you heard someone say that a certain guy or gal did something in ernest?  OK, I have searched maps and Googled it but for the life of me, I can't find a town named Ernest.  So, where the heck is this place where all this stuff is suppose to be happening???

I have heard of Ernest Hemmingway (the writer) and Ernest Rutherford (the physicist).  Ernest Hemmingway wrote some great novels.  Here is a picture of him:

 

He was born in 1899 and passed away in 1961 at the age of 61.  He died in the year I graduated from high school.  Do you see a pattern here?  He Passed at in 1961, at age 61 and I graduated in '61.  No, I am not worried, since it has been many years since I was 61.

Not only was he a famous writer, but he was quite the big game hunter.  He loved hunting in Africa.  But his life was cut short by a terrible disease called hemochromatosis which caused him deep depression and severe pain.  Although he shot himself, it was the disease that actually caused his early death.

There was another Ernest that had a hand in changing the world for ever.  This was Ernest Rutherford.  He was a New Zealand physicist who came to be known as the father of nuclear physics.  Both of these Ernests changed the world, one in literature and the other paved the road to advances in medicine and, I hate to say, warfare.  Here is a picture of Rutherford:

He was a New Zealand physicist who came to be known as the father of nuclear physics.  Now, you can think of these two guys when someone says "in ernest".  You all have a great evening, you hear?

Aloe Vera and Maybe an Intruder.

Aloe Vera is a succulent that can treat burns, look nice, and bloom sometimes.  My wife has several Aloe plants and one of them is now blooming.  Click on the pictures to enlarge them.  This first one shows how tall the flowering stalk is:

And a close-up of the flowering part: 

This next picture shows the base plant much better than the first picture does:

I noticed some muddy tracks on my deck this morning.  We must have had an intruder last night.  Not quite sure what it was, maybe a cat or a coon or an opossum.  So far I haven't seen any damage that the intruder caused.

Do any of you know what made the above tracks?  If so, let me know.  Now, you all have a great day, you hear?

Nicknames

Tell me, do you go by your given first name or do you answer to a nickname?  Most of us have a nickname that we use most of the time.  Yes, I have a nickname.  Actually, I have two nicknames.  My given first name is Richard, but as long as I can remember, they called me Dick.  After I grew up and became an amateur radio operator, I got another nickname that stuck.  Since my call ended in DZY, they started calling me Dizzy.

There are a lot of common nicknames out there.  Here is a list of just a very few of them:

Abby (or Abbie) for Abigail
Abe for Abraham
Al for Alfred
Bill for William
Cathy for Cathleen
Cindy for Cynthia
Ed for Edward
Flo for Florence
Jan for Janet
Jo for Josophine
Joe for Joseph
Maggy for Margaret
Pat for Patricia
Peggy for Margaret
Woody for Elwood

I can understand a lot of them, but a few I have no idea how the nickname evolved from the given name.  There are lots and lots more nicknames I could list, but the above should give you an idea of what I am talking about.

On another note, when I go to bed at night I lay there thinking of all the great subjects that I could write about in my blog.  Of course, when waking up in the morning, I can never remember them.  Yes, I know, I should keep a pad and pencil by the bed to write down my ideas, but at that time of night, I am trying to go to sleep.  Oh well, this blog posting will have to do until I can remember some of those great ideas (grin).  Until then, I want you to have a great day, you hear?

Been Invaded Again.

Yes, I have been invaded again.  The last time it was red wasps, this time it was a possum.

My wife told me that she has been hearing things under the floor, so after a few days of putting it off (never get in a hurry to take on an new project), I put some cheese in a couple of rat traps and also put some in a live trap.  This morning when I checked the traps, sure enough there was a possum in the live trap and he was not happy.  Sort of looked like this:

BTW, I did not take the above pictures but found them on the internet.  They look just like the one I caught.  The one I caught was a male and tried to bite though the cage.  I dispatched him to go visit his long dead ancestors and then I tried to get his remains out of the cage.  He died with a death grip on cage so had to pry his teeth loose.  I find no joy at all when I have to put an animal down, would prefer to relocate them to another location but sometimes, they come back.  Well, that is what my morning involved, how about yours?  Hope you all have a great day, you hear?  

Sting Operation

I got caught in a sting operation.  According to thefreedictionary.com , a sting operation "is a complicated confidence came planned and executed with great care (especially an operation implemented by undercover agents to apprehend criminals)".  But I didn't have to go before a judge and his gavel.

No, I didn't get hauled in front of judge, I was attacked by red wasps.  They have started a nest just above our back door and when I opened the door and stepped out, wham, one hit me on my arm.  It stung me and I wiped it off and stepped on it three or four times.  Wanted to make sure it couldn't sting me again.  I got my camera and took a picture of the nest on my porch ceiling:

That was two days ago and my arm is still red and itchy.  I guess I had a reaction to the wasp's venom.  I have never had a reaction before and, yes, I have been stung before but it has been awhile.  The only reason that I posted about it, is because nothing special has been going on the last few days, so why not.  Now be careful around stinging insects and have a great day, you hear?

Everybody likes jokes that make them chuckle.  So do I.  So. . . I figured I would try to find some short jokes that will make you chuckle or at least smile.  So here they are:

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If you can kill a blood sucking vampire with a stake through the heart, how do you kill a vegetarian vampire?  With a "steak" to the heart.

A soldier survived mustard gas in battle, then pepper spray by police.  He's now a seasoned veteran.

Hay Barney, what is the difference between a golfer and a skydiver?  Give up?  OK, a golfer goes whack "damn" and a skydiver goes "damn" whack.

What do you call a magic dog? A Labracadabrador.

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom?  Because the "P" is silent.

Time flies like an arrow, fruit flies like a banana.

Why didn't the lifeguard save the hippie?  Because he was too far out man!

A guy started a band and called it 999 Megabytes - he hasn't gotten a gig yet.

A farmer in the field with his cows counted 196 of them, but when he rounded them up he had 200.

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OK, I am going to quit now.  Hope some of the above made you smile.  Now, have a great evening, you hear?

Cute, cute, cute, etc., etc., etc.

I think that we wore out the word "cute" today and also the word "precious".  Why?  Because our grandson brought our great grandson to my place for a his first visit.  Yes, I am a great grandpa now and my great grand son is just so cute.  OK, don't believe me?  Well just take a look at the following pictures.  This first one is of my great grandson in his plaid shirt, jeans, and brown shoes:

This next one is of my grandson putting shoes on my great grandson.  He wasn't too happy about that:

Mommy and Daddy and baby makes three, are getting ready to leave:

 My grandson is the son of my boy that got killed in a highway accident.  Too bad he didn't get to see his son's son.  My grandson is carrying on a family tradition.  My grandpa's first born was a boy, my Dad's first born was me, my first born was boy, and my grandson's first born is a boy.  And, did I say he is cute?  This was the first time that I got to see him in person.

Now, ain't he cute?

Lane made our day.  I would like you all to have a great day, too, you hear?

"A" is for. . .

There are more things that "A" can stand for other than "A" is for Apple. 

"A" can also stand for one of the worst and deadliest inventions of mass destruction the world has ever known.  I am talking about the A-bomb.  If any of you are as old as I am, you can remember the days of "duck and cover" that we learned at school and the well stocked bomb shelters with the Civil Defense emblem at their entrance.  I remember that my Dad had a white hard hat with that emblem on it.  We all never wanted to see that extra bright flash signaling a bomb explosion when those shelters would be needed.

Here are three pictures from the 1950's tests carried out New Mexico:

What I didn't know was how quick that new invention of mass destruction would be put to use.  The U.S. first tested an A-bomb on July 16, 1945 and dropped the first A-bomb on Hiroshima on August 6, 1945.  That was less than a month from the first ever test explosion.  Then on the 9th, the second atomic bomb was dropped on Nagasaki and not long after that, the Japanese surrendered.  It amazes me just how quick after the first test, it was used.  Not long after this, a more terrible bomb was conceived and produced; the hydrogen bomb.

Let us all hope and pray that the countries of this world will think twice before releasing these weapons or more terrible weapons upon the world and learn to live in peace, understanding, and assist other than destroy their brother nations of the world.  Now, you all live in peace and have a great day, you hear?

Did You Miss Me?

It has been four days since I last posted and normally, I post a blog every day.  So, did you miss me?  Nope, I bet you never noticed.  If you did miss me, why?  I have a lot why's for you today:

1.   Why is the United States nicknamed Uncle Sam?

2.   Why do identical twins have different fingerprints?

3.   Why do fingers and toes wrinkle when left in water?

4.   Do plants die of old age?

5.   Atoms form everything around us, but only account for 5 percent of our universe.  What two things make up most of the rest?

And last but not least:

6.   Why don't cannibals eat clowns?








And of course, I can't let you guessing if you knew the right answers, so here are the answers:

1.   Back during the war of 1812, a meat packer named Samuel Wilson, who supplied barrels of beef to the United States Army.  These barrels were stamped U.S. for the United States, but the soldiers referred to the U.S. as Uncle Sam and I guess it stuck.

2.   Fingerprints are formed semi-randomly as the fetus develops in the womb.  Even though they have the same DNA, not all appearance is totally controlled by it.

3.   Places like your hands and feet get the natural waterproof coating rubbed off over time and thus the skin absorbs water and swells.  Because it is anchored below, it is forced to corrugate to take up the extra skin, thus the wrinkles.

4.   Yes and no.  Some do and some, under the right conditions, can live for ever.

5.   Dark matter and dark energy.

6.   Because clowns taste funny.

Now, you all have a great day and after reading this blog posting, you may want me to wait more than four days to post another (grin).  Now, you all have a great day and keep on a smiling, you hear?

Quotes That Made Me Smile

I was browsing through the internet today and came across these quotes, among others, that made me smile.  So, I thought that I would just put a few of them on my blog today along with a link to where they, and others, can be found.  So, I hope you enjoy them.

All the following quotes are from http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/keywords/stuid.html

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The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt. Bertrand Russell

Life is tough, but it's tougher if you're stupid. John Wayne


Men are born ignorant, not stupid. They are made stupid by education. Bertrand Russell


The wise are instructed by reason, average minds by experience, the stupid by necessity and the brute by instinct. Marcus Tullius Cicero


A woman's mind is cleaner than a man's: She changes it more often. Oliver Herford


We are all here on earth to help others; what on earth the others are here for I don't know. W. H. Auden


People who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do. Isaac Asimov


Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired. Jules Renard

And of course, a list of this kind wouldn't be complete without a quote from Yogi Bera:

I never said most of the things I said. Yogi Berra
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OK, I sure hope they also put a smile on your face and make sure you have a great day, you hear?